(Soundtrack/Game) Bard's Tale - 2005, MP3, 256 kbps

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Beer, Beer, Beer
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Beer, Beer, Beer, tiddly beer, beer, beer
A long time ago way back in history
When all there was to drink, was nothing but cups of tea.
Along came a man by the name of Charlie Mopps,
And he invented a wonderful drink and he made it out of hops.
Hey!
He must have been an admiral, a sultan, or a king.
And to his praises we shall always sing.
Look at what he's done for us, he's filled us up with cheer.
Lord Bless Charlies Mopps the man who invented
Beer, Beer, Beer, tiddly beer, beer, beer
The Drunken Rat, the Aiken Drum, the Trowles Pub as well,
One thing you can be sure of, it's Charlies' beer they sell
So all ye lads and lasses at eleven o'clock ye stop.
For five short seconds, remember Charlies Mopps.
One,
Two,
Three,
Four,
Five...
Hey!
He must have been an admiral, a sultan, or a king.
And to his praises we shall always sing.
Look at what he's done for us, he's filled us up with cheer.
Lord Bless Charlies Mopps the man who invented
Beer, Beer, Beer, tiddly beer, beer, beer
A barrel of malt, a bushel of hops, you stir it around with a stick.
The kind of lubrication to make your engines tick.
forty pints of wallop a day will keep away the quacks.
Its only eight pence hapenny, and one and six in tax.
One,
Two,
Three,
Four,
Five...
Hey!
He must have been an admiral, a sultan, or a king.
And to his praises we shall always sing.
Look at what he's done for us, he's filled us up with cheer.
Lord Bless Charlies Mopps the man who invented
Beer, Beer, Beer, tiddly beer, beer, beer, tiddly beer, beer, beer.
The Lord bless Charlie Mopps.
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Tale of the Nukelavee
=====================
I'll tattle a tale that is terribly true.
Stated out as a rumor, but suddenly grew.
And it deals with a man, and a horse, and a ring.
So settle on in and our song we shall sing.
It happened one day in a ring by a farm
Some that tragically brought us much harm
How could a place abundant with charm
Create such a beast with a spear for an arm.
On death and destruction is what you will get
When he's coming for you and in your kilt you will wet.
And he's big and he's strong and its quite plain to see.
That this is the Tale of the Nukelavee.
Nukelavee! Oh Nukelavee
You're big and evil and heinous
Who could it be who set you free?
He really must be an anus.
Oh Nukelavee it's easy to see
the terror you leave is raining on me.
The village is burned and the taverns are missed
and the beer is all gone and the elders are pissed.
And if they ever should find the fool
We'll hang him upside down by his tool
And spin him around until he gets sick
Ooh! Aah! Oh, that should do the trick.
Nukelavee! Oh Nukelavee
The terror you offer is high class
Who could it be who set you free?
He really must be a dumbass.
Nukelavee! Oh Nukelavee
The horror you furnish is widespread
Who could it be who set you free?
He really must be an ox-head.
Now everyone knows no blood should spill
In the sacred ring by the farm on the hill
And if that ever happen the Death you should fear.
He'll kick in your nuts and he'll server them with beer.
So one final thought before I depart,
And this my friends comes straight from the heart.
We'd all be fine if not for that bell
And that horse killing wanker that opened up hell.
Nukelavee! Oh Nukelavee
We cannot win we must admit
Who could it be who set you free?
He really must be a dimwit.
Nukelavee! Oh Nukelavee
You're big and evil and heinous
Who could it be who set you free?
He really must be an anus.
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Here's to the Bard
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Come gather 'round all ye Bastards!
And raise up your cup to this arse-turd.
He came and freed the fires of hell,
and let 'im run loose over hill and dell.
Here's to the Bard, and his scab of a brain,
Here's to the Dragon and all it has slain.
The gate is knocked in and the town is aflame.
And it's ours for the taking, and you get the fame.
We tortured some townsfolk, it's true.
And Pounded, but Couldn't breakthrough.
With all of his might, the Dragon took flight
And Burned the town down to a ball-bag of shite.
Here's to the Bard and his knob of a head.
Here's to the Orkney, the smoke, and the dead.
The gate is knocked in and the town is aflame.
And it's ours for the taking, and you get the fame.
Here's to the Bard and a pullin' me plum.
Here's to the Beast and the rest of you scum.
The gate is knocked in and the town is aflame.
And it's ours for the taking, though you get the fame.
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You're a Foolish One
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You are a jerk, a piece of work,
This mission you'll be blowin'
There's one thing 'both this castle here
You surely should be knowing'
That once inside your magic's gone
and danger will be growing
And if you meet the Shadow Axe
Your blood it will be flowing
You're knowin', it's growin', you're blowin'
Oooohhhhh!!
You're a foolish one
Someone who should be shunned.
You've buggered up this land so much
Your work is never done.
And when we see you comin'
We'll turn our tails and run
You are the lad we love to hate
You are a fooling one.
It's fun, to run, you're done.
You aren't brave, You aren't strong
or even that imposin'
You have no magic helmet,
or kilt or lederhosen.
If danger were to read its head
your feet would sure be frozen
A sorry wuss, but nevertheless,
the sod that has been Chosen.
A frozen, lederhosen, imposin'.
Oooohhhh!!
You're a foolish one
Someone who should be shunned.
You've buggered up this land so much
Your work is never done.
And when we see you comin'
We'll turn our tails and run
You are the lad we love to hate
You are a fooling one.
It's fun, to run, WE'RE DONE.
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Bad Luck - Ogan
===============
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
A chosen one of many isn't new
When you think you're full of luck
in the bullock's you'll get struck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Now, Ogan came young from the farm.
And tried to save the princess from all harm.
Equipped with just a stick
And a head made out of brick.
His rabbit's foot failed as a charm.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
The prophecy is never coming true
In a pickle you'll be stuck
Like a chicken you'll cluck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Believing that he was the one
His Ego weighed in at a ton.
His Mum's a crazy bat.
Did we mention that she was fat.
And she'll need a pine box for her son.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Don't think for just a second it's not true
When your life has run amuck
You'll see that you're the schmuck.
Oh, it's bad luck to be
Really bad luck to be
Nobody could disagree.
It's a freaking guarantee.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Diddly doo.
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Bad Luck - Wolves
=================
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
A chosen one of many isn't new
When you think you're full of luck
in the bullock's you'll get struck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
The wolves over yonder packed a punch
So listen carefully to our hunch
To be the chosen one
Really sound like loads of fun.
But in the end you'll just be someone's lunch.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
The prophecy is never coming true
In a pickle you'll be stuck
Like a chicken you'll cluck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Your mourning for this boy was very brief.
You certainly did not show any grief.
You pillaged his cadaver
But in the end it didn't matter
You're nothing but a two-bit common thief
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Don't think for just a second it's not true
When your life has run amuck
You'll see that you're the schmuck.
Oh, it's bad luck to be
Really bad luck to be
Nobody could disagree.
It's a freaking guarantee.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Diddly doo.
=================
Bad Luck - Minion
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Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
A chosen one of many isn't new
When you think you're full of luck
in the bullock's you'll get struck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
This minion seems to like to run and hide.
I wouldn't be too sure he's on your side.
If he leaves at every change.
You should kick him in the pants.
his strong points doesn't seem to be a guide.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
The prophecy is never coming true
In a pickle you'll be stuck
Like a chicken you'll cluck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
have you noticed that while traveling on this path.
The bodies you've encountered felt the wrath.
Kunal Trow are very scary
And a few a bit too hairy
And their armpits stink so bad they need a bath.
Pee-Yew!
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Don't think for just a second it's not true
When your life has run amuck
You'll see that you're the schmuck.
Oh, it's bad luck to be
Really bad luck to be
Nobody could disagree.
It's a freaking guarantee.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Diddly doo.
===============
Bad Luck - Jail
===============
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
A chosen one of many isn't new
When you think you're full of luck
in the bullock's you'll get struck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
One would think that fame and glory could be bought.
When it comes to Chosen One's there are a lot.
There seems to be too many
I don't really think there's any.
A useless pile of bunk is what you've got.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
The prophecy is never coming true
In a pickle you'll be stuck
Like a chicken you'll cluck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
These silly boy's aren't doing very well
The Sheriff had to put them in a cell
This isn't a reflection
That you're not in his collection
You're better off just going straight to hell.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Don't think for just a second it's not true
When your life has run amuck
You'll see that you're the schmuck.
Oh, it's bad luck to be
Really bad luck to be
Nobody could disagree.
It's a freaking guarantee.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Diddly doo.
====================
Bad Luck - Lava Life
====================
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
A chosen one of many isn't new
When you think you're full of luck
in the bullock's you'll get struck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
You came upon a lad with confidence.
The contemplating moments growing tense.
He tried to clarify
His unthinking reasons why
But in the end his logic made no sense.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
The prophecy is never coming true
In a pickle you'll be stuck
Like a chicken you'll cluck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
His thirst for adventure didn't bend
A helping hand is all you tried to lend
The treasure did entice
And you wound up being nice.
You saved him from what could have been the end.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Don't think for just a second it's not true
When your life has run amuck
You'll see that you're the schmuck.
Oh, it's bad luck to be
Really bad luck to be
Nobody could disagree.
It's a freaking guarantee.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Diddly doo.
=====================
Bad Luck - Lava Death
=====================
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
A chosen one of many isn't new
When you think you're full of luck
in the bullock's you'll get struck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
You came upon a lad with confidence.
The contemplating moments growing tense.
He tried to clarify
His unthinking reasons why
But in the end his logic made no sense.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
The prophecy is never coming true
In a pickle you'll be stuck
Like a chicken you'll cluck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
He really felt that he was unique
Treasures and adventures he did seek.
he strived to prove you wrong
and so we sing the song.
His future plans are looking very bleak.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Don't think for just a second it's not true
When your life has run amuck
You'll see that you're the schmuck.
Oh, it's bad luck to be
Really bad luck to be
Nobody could disagree.
It's a freaking guarantee.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Diddly doo.
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Bad Luck - Bard
================
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
A chosen one of many isn't new
When you think you're full of luck
in the bullock's you'll get struck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
It's time to face you're own reality.
There's one thing we can say with certainty.
That it's you that has been chosen
Even though you've been opposin'
I guess you were the only nominee.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
The prophecy is never coming true
In a pickle you'll be stuck
Like a chicken you'll cluck
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
We've come to the end of our tale
We've sung a lot and drank up all the ale.
You are pretty much a fraud
And for that we do applaud.
Even though we all were hoping you would fail.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Don't think for just a second it's not true
When your life has run amuck
You'll see that you're the schmuck.
Oh, it's bad luck to be
Really bad luck to be
Nobody could disagree.
It's a freaking guarantee.
Oh, it's bad luck to be you.
Diddly doo.